Halloween Jokes

Halloween is a time for spooky costumes, eerie decorations, and playful tricks. While the holiday is rooted in ancient traditions, it has also become an occasion for light-hearted fun, jokes and humour.

Halloween jokes and humour play a key role in this, blending the spooky with the silly. From puns about ghosts and goblins to witty one-liners about witches and pumpkins, Halloween humour helps bring a sense of joy and laughter to the dark and mysterious themes of the season.

It’s all about embracing the fun side of fright!

Vampire Jokes

What’s a vampire’s least favorite meal?

A steak!

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite!

How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?

All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts!!

What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?

A grave problem!

What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?

It’s a pain in the neck!

How do vampires get around on Halloween?

On blood vessels – of course!!

Why did the vampire read the newspaper?

He heard it had great circulation!

Witch Jokes

What do witches put on their bagels?

Scream cheese!!

What makes trick or treating with twin witches so challenging?

You never know which witch is which!

What’s a witch’s favourite makeup?

Ma-scare-a!!

What do you call two witches who live together?

Broom-mates!

What was the witch’s favourite subject in school?

Spelling!

What kind of food would you find on a haunted beach?

A sand-witch!

What do you call a witch’s garage?

A broom closet!

Ghost & Goblin Jokes

What position does a ghost play in hockey?

Ghoulie!!

What do ghosts eat for dinner?

Spook-ghetti!

How do you know when a ghost is sad?

He starts boo hooing!!

Where does a ghost go on vacation?

Mali-boo!!

Why did the ghost starch his sheet?

He wanted everyone scared stiff

What’s a ghost’s favourite dessert?

I-Scream!

Why do ghosts go on diets?

So they can keep their ghoulish figures!

Skeleton Jokes

What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal?

“Bone Appetit!”

How do you make a skeleton laugh?

You tickle his funny bone!

What do skeletons order at a restaurant?

Spare ribs

What do you call a cleaning skeleton?

The grim sweeper!!

Know why skeletons are so calm?

Because nothing gets under their skin!

Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?

They have no body to love!

Mummy Jokes

What tops off a mummy’s ice cream sundae?

Whipped scream!

Why don’t mummies have friends?

Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves!

What kind of music do mummies like listening to on Halloween?

Wrap music!!

Why did the headless horseman go into business?

He wanted to get ahead in life!

Why don’t mummies take time off?

They’re afraid to unwind!